SCAM #35: EUGENE COLLETE

I'm always amazed at how many people die without leaving a next of kin regarding their money. Thank goodness there are auditors looking out for potential suckers:

From: EUGENE COLLETE <eempress1989@gmail.com>

Date: Sunday, June 7, 2015
Subject: Claim of My Partner Investment Company Fund / Deposit Number Ref: A526J25

Claim of My Partner Investment Company Fund / Deposit Number Ref: A526J25

I am the chief auditor and head of computing department of a financial institution.

There is an account opened in this branch in 2005 and after our third quarter audit exercise at my branch on 9th  January  2014, I investigated deeply by contacting the assigned next of kin. I also found that the next of kin to this account was an Indonesian who lived in London for over 63 yrs and nobody has transacted on this account again after 2006.

I took the courage to look for a reliable and honest person who will be capable of this important transaction. In order to transfer out (Ten Million Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars). After going through some old files, I discovered that if I do not Remit this money out soon, it will be forfeited for nothing and the Bank management might divert the funds to their repository account as blocked fund.

Please respond immediately as I will use my position and influence to effect the legal approval and onward transfer of this fund into your account with appropriate clearance from foreign payment department. You will stand to get 30% while 70% will be for me and other colleagues involved. A word is enough for the wise, i await your soonest reply.

Sincerely yours,

Eugene Collete

eempress1989@gmail.com

 Even with splitting over $10-million, 70/30 doesn't seem fair -- unless you're Chester Hooten:

Dear Mr. Collete,

Count me in! I'm sick of banks grabbing other people's money, so I think it's about time I did some grabbing of my own. As you wish, I'm honest and reliable, having never told a lie in my entire life (except for the time when I told someone I liked their chocolate pudding when it actually tasted like cow patties.)

I tried to do 30% of ten million 500 thousand, but couldn't figure it out (I'm not good at math -- see, I'm honest about it!) but it sounds like enough to keep me stocked with beef jerky and Miller Lite for a while. Let me know what I have to do help you. I like helping people, especially when it means a payout for me.

Honestly and reliably yours,

Chester Hooten 

 After not receiving a supply with a week, I forgot about my fortune. But then on the eighth day, a miracle occurred -- but with a different return address.

From: Shannon Emres

To Chester Hooten

Jun 15 at 11:43 AM

Hello Chester,

i appreciate your concern on the project. To clear all doubts, all expenses on our side will be taken care-of, the most important point of focus is to know how genuine you are to carry out payment instructions as soon as you are in possession of the fund. Please i will like to know what part of country your financial institution is located and where you live.

If possible kindly identify your self and i shall carry you along with the project without delay. i shall furnish you with proper detail as regards the project. 

Hope to here from you soon buddy!

 Eugene.C

 Shannon, Eugene -- what does it matter when a fortune is at stake? I replied quickly:

Same back at you, buddy!

Yes I am genuinely genuine to carry out your instructions. I like following instructions because I can't think for myself, so whatever you want to do, I'm your boy. Or should I say buddy boy!

My bank is where I live in Bunko, Montana. The name of the bank is Bunko Trust, Savings, and Maybe Some Loans. And I will identify myself: yes, I am Chester Hooten.

I hope I did well. Let's get going on this project, Eugene.C!

Yours to command,

Chester Hooten

This time, Eugene replied within a day. And, unlike most of the other scammers, he actually seemed to take the time to read my email. Of course, his grammar and syntax skills were still lacking:

Hi Chester,

how do you do today? you seem to be a very nice person with good sense of humor but seriously this a corporate financial business therefore you need to be the boss of you own and not someone else's boy okay so please i would love to do business with you but you need to be more serious because projects like this involves experience or knowledge in corporate governance. It is a life time opportunity to seriously archive you goals, though it is through a back door of which most of the rich people including government officials around the world do use. Please let me know if you are matured or ripe enough for this project. Its not a child's play. 

Cheers

Eugene

 How to proceed? Continue my idiot routine, or keep him hanging on? I chose the latter:

Hello Eugene,

You're right. I was pretending to be silly, just to see if yours was a real offer. I'm glad to see you're serious about this project. Please, let me know exactly what information you need from me.

I look forward to working with you.

Chester Hooten 

When I received a reply, I thought it was from Yoda:

Hi Chester,

A great decision you have finally taken, i am very sure you will be grateful to God you did. Straight to business; please i don't want you to think other wise if i request for certain information about you, reason is to know how capable and serious you are as well as to your economic financial status and true identity. If you were in my shoes i'm sure you will do the same especially when it involves crucial projects like this one. In order for me to give you details of the project, i will like to know a little about you after which i shall reveal my identity to you. 

First i will like to know what work you do for a living, what institutions you bank with, a little about you and send me a valid identification of your self. Then i will be more comfortable to work with you. Above all your loyalty, commitment and truthfulness is what matters the most. 

Hope to hear from you soon my friend .

Eugene

These scammers never take the time to learn basics, like capitalizing "I" or not writing run-on sentences. But that didn't stop me from sending a serious-sounding reply:

Dear Eugene,

Glad to hear from you so quickly. I live in Omaha Nebraska, and manage the local Walmart. I have a checking and savings account at the First National Bank of Omaha.

I admit, however, that I'm a little uneasy about giving my ID (I have a passport and drivers license, along with a Social Security card) without knowing who you are. I'm not sure how things work in London, but in America, if someone wants to start a transaction with another person, they always properly identify themselves first.

I would be happy to provide proper ID if you do the same first. I'm sorry if this is a problem, and will understand if you want to end our deal here. 

Chester Hooten

Usually if I've strung them along this long, they'll do whatever I ask of them. Not Eugene, who used a different font for the occasion:

Hello Chester,

It is good to know about who you are dealing with, please you need to understand that due to my position in the bank and the nature of my job which is audit, it is imperative i conceal my identity for now but most definitely you shall get to meet me sooner or latter in person as soon as we get green light on the transfers. Please don't feel bad about this, it is just the same way you will play if you were in shoes however here is a little about me you should know. As you already know my names, i am a chief auditor in a leading financial institution and most times in my unit we come across many blocked funds, fix cash deposits, unclaimed inheritance funds, dormant account etc. we can only but carefully select some transactions to divert after proper investigations. I am a family man and my family is settled abroad schooling also, there are lots of bills to pay . That is why there is need some times for such fund diversion as long as it is carefully orchestrated. Chester, i can only assure you that upon genuine commitment to this project i shall reveal more details about me and the business in question as this will definitely be necessary, but a step at a time because this is a sensitive  project.

Less i forget, you have to send me a copy of your identification as this will also be needed for the processing 

Please do not hesitate to ask me any question regarding this project as i will be delighted to answer as long as you intentions are genuine.

Eugene.

Before I had a chance to reply, he sent another email:

Hello Chester,

How was your weekend? hope you had a good one? I was wondering if you got the last mail i sent to you, anyway, i had a second thought; I should trust you based on your words of sincerity. I believe that you are a genuine person and God fearing so therefore i shall reveal my identity to you but you must promise to keep it top secret. I am a senior internal auditor for the central bank of Benin in west Africa. I am a Swiss national and the best expert the bank can hire. My real names are Frostl Wolfgang Franz and i have attached my identification for your perusal. As i said earlier my family is based abroad so i travel frequently to visit them i also visit the states as well. Please always address me via this email as Eugene for security reasons only. Don't be doubtful or scared as i can't bring problems to you. Let get on with this project and we will have every cause to smile in the end. Send the details i request for and i shall tell you more about the project okay.I hope to speak on phone with you soon. God bless you.

Eugene 

Frostl the Scam-man was a jolly happy soul. I thought it best to repay him in kind:

Hello Eugene,

Thank you, I had a pretty good weekend. I caught someone trying to shoplift a radio and, in the ensuing struggle, beat him into a coma. Luckily, I won't get charged with any crime, since he was the criminal. My boss gives his workers a bonus for every shoplifter we beat senseless, so I'm looking forward to some more criminals to pop by.

Thank you for your license. You look very serious, so I know I can trust you. I've attached a photo of my passport. I look forward to us working together soon.

Chester "Happy Traveler" Hooten

PS: You should know that there's someone on Linkedin using your name, and he's definitely not you! You should call the police.

I figured that this would be the end of the line. But I discovered that Eugene was more idiot than scammer:

Hello Chester,

I was just wondering why someone would want to shoplift or steal a radio, its really funny you know i only see that in the movies so are you really serious about that or you are just been silly as usual??? lolz

Also instead of beating him to coma why didn't you just call the cops hun? i hope you don't get charged latter days especially if they have it on camera. 

Back to business, Please forgive me if i'm wrong but i would love to know the truth if your true names are Happy Traveler ? sound too good to be true. Please i need your cooperation on this project and like i said earlier please don't worry about paying any bill okay, everything has been taken care of all i need is your trust commitment and loyalty, as soon as you are in possession of the funds, i need you to yield to instructions on how to channel my share to proper investment in the states. Don't worry Chester God is on our side as it is our turn to shine and get wealthy.

Less i forget, i'm not the only person on earth bearing the name Wolfgang so it is possible someone else bares the name too after all its a free world you should know better so i don;t think its worth it call the police for that.

Hey, send me your phone number so i can call you up.

I was getting sick of this back & forth, so if the phony ID didn't work, I thought my phone number would.

Don't worry. I destroyed the video that was in the camera. We just told the cops that the guy fell down several times. Which he did -- on my fist!

Yes, Happy Traveler is my real name; Chester Hooten are my middle names. I use that most of the time because, frankly, Happy Traveler sounds like something someone would make up for a sample passport photo. 

Trust, commitment and loyalty are truly the greatest things a person can offer. And I know I can count on you to be contrapositive -- and I mean that in the best way possible. My phone number is (402) 493-8688. Call me anytime -- can't wait to hear from you!

Chester Hooten 

I figured that by calling that number -- the Omaha branch office of the FBI -- he'd immediately know I was on to him. I mean, I was getting sick of this conversation. But Eugene decided to wait before calling. His email was one large paragraph, which I've divided up for easier reading -- if you can call this insult to grammar and syntax easy to read:

 Hello Chester,

LOL ! You are such a funny yet interesting man anyway, i hope you didn't hurt your fist tho. Thanks for sending your number, it surely will make communication lot easier between us.

Okay without delay i should brief you on this project that we are about to embark upon, so as to begin the process as soon as possible. 

Like i stated in my previous mails, As an senior auditor in a financial institution heading the central audit unit, we usually come across series of accounts and investment funds been owned by "only God knows" some kind of wealthy, greedy and selfishly self-centered  government officials using all sorts of investment programs to stalk public funds away from their different countries offshore. If you are conversant with international news most especial africa and asia, i'm sure this bastardy acts won't be strange to you. 

We find financial records aging back 8 -12 years ago deposit without anyone coming for claims all because most of these officials use either relatives' or partners' identities to conceal these huge funds from the public and they spread across across different financial policy friendly countries via their big investment banks or central banks. In order not to bore you with banking and financial ordeals we encounter, i thought you should have an idea of where i'm coming from so you would know where we are heading to. 

Okay enough of that... now here is the deal; there is an account i came across few years back and since been monitoring as well as investigated the account. I found out that the owner was late and Indonesian woman who lived and died in England. The account was only operated for about 2 yrs and since then till now still remains dormant without anyone coming for claim. Well as a professional in my field this sounds like an opportunity to hit a jackpot. If i turn blind eyes.. well the funds within next few years will be forfeited into the bank repository afterwards, some day if not stolen by bank chiefs and their shareholders, then it might be declared as excess funds who knows???.

Anyway Chester we need to act now and fast for their is no harm trying. I shall draft out an application letter which you shall submit to the bank's email i shall provide for you. as soon as that is done, we are on the go ! and i know that with my influence and the corporation of 2 other colleagues in my unit, we shall succeed. This won't be the first after all. Smiles.

Please stay true  to the end and you will be glad you did. 

So do begin to draft the latter? 

If you have any questions please do not hesitate to ask me.

I shall be coming to the states in 2 weeks to see my daughter in school doing her masters program and see my doctor for medical checkup, sorry to say but i'm diabetic. I will definitely call you when i'm in the states.

Please keep this transaction very confidential, i'm counting on you.

I await you response.

Have a nice day.

Eugene

I had to make it clear that our little scheme was kaput:

 

Bad news. You know that guy I knocked into a coma? There are witnesses now coming forward, and it doesn't look good for me. My lawyer is urging me to plead guilty and throw myself at the mercy of the court. I'm looking at no less than 10 years in prison.

I'm writing this from my lawyer's laptop. The police are searching for my hard drive for proof  of any other "crimes" I might have committed. If they get in touch with you, don't be afraid, you weren't doing anything wrong.

Sorry to have to back out of our plan. I hope you find someone else to work with. It sure sounded promising.

Chester

I haven't heard from him since. 

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SCAM #34: DR. RICHARD JAMES

 Once again, the UN is on the march, handing out money to scam victims:

From: United Nations Alerts <alerts56@fsdete.com>
Date: Fri, Mar 6, 2015 at 7:27 PM
Subject: Response Needed

UN/WB/FNG COMPENSATION COMMISSION

OUR REF: UN-FGA/WB4/14

YOUR REF: (UN/WB/FGA)..00/15

BATCH: 807-2011-550/188/6-03-15

Scam Compensation approved in your name through United Nations mass assisted project funds. This compensation involves business investment failure, Inheritance, Contracts, Lottery, Dating, Diplomatic Payment, loan E.T.C, the mass assisted fund was approved to settle failed business / scam extortion.

Attn Scam Victim.

We wish to inform you that your scam compensation approved through United Nations mass assisted project, we have severally tried to contact you without success, are you willing to receive your scam compensation? You have to respond as soon as you receive this message because we have your compensation file submitted by UN external auditors in Switzerland and we have not heard from you. International global security watchers reported different degrees of scams and their mouthwatering proposals.

1, most times they will contact you to help them claim some certain amount of money as next of kin, 2, they will send different manners of mouthwatering proposals of how you become a contractor of some over-invoice amount, they will present you as inheritor to some funds, They even went to the extent of promising you marriage which will still end up extorting your hard earned money, they used different means and stories like buying of gold and precious stones and scraps which also will result to scam in the end, most times they impersonates and offer you job opportunities that still end in extorting your hard earned money and also uses ATM system to reap you off . Their intentions have always been to wreck you financially and emotionally because nothing good will be archived in the end. We have comprehensive information about how they operate through the security INTEL of international security watchers, they impersonate with fabricated documents without AICD security chip.

They impersonate FBI and other security offices to intimidate or threatened you to send them money or go to jail. You will hear more as soon as you respond to this message.

In furtherance, I presumed you must have been wondering why after paying all the fees requested by those crooks nothing was paid to you rather they enjoyed your hard earned money without remorse of their evil deeds.Those crooks operates through different avenues, locations and from many countries especially west Africa Nigeria, Spain, Ghana, Benin republic, London, Malaysia, Indonesia E.T.C.

The funds was approved so that you can invest into your own private business, it serves as help to your financial growth, it serves as debt reconciliation. Calculate how much you have sent to them yet not even a cent has been given to you, for how long will you believe them? Please don’t waste time to contact us for more information’s.

Finally, you will be surprise to hear more but be happy that United Nations mass assisted project has come to your rescue whatever you have gone through in their hands. We are going to provide %100 percent comprehensive evidence and gazette of how your scam compensation will be released, you can make inquiry and submit whatever business you are doing at the moment for security check and Intel report of the truth in the business. You will not regret rather be bold to expose evil no matter how they preach and convince you.

Regards

Dr. Richard James

Protocol Officer

I like "%100 percent" -- that's as professional as it gets. I was up for the challenge:
 

Crooks crooks crooks everywhere! Thank God for the United Nations. If you do the same bang-up job at rounding up internet crooks as you are defeating ISIS, well this should be a crime-free world at last!!

Yes I want to expose evil. Mr. James, you are the only honest person I can trust right now. I will do whatever you ask of me. Do you know why? Because you are honest! Tell me what to do, pronto. I want that goddamn money and I want it now because I DESERVE IT!!

Chester Hooten

When I didn't immediately hear from the good doctor, I figured all was lost. Until...

Attention: Chester Hooten,

I have received your response; the compensation was approved generally for global settlement of debts originated from bad investment and scam extortion. You have to provide the below stated coordinates required for international processing of your funds through ANZ bank Australia.

1, Your Full name, address, mobile telephone number, identification of your person, occupation and next of kin.

Finally, is imperative you stop further communications with anybody at the moment until after the receipt of your funds through the bank. This is not scam because you are not paying to receive the funds; a fiduciary agent shall consult the clearing of your funds once you respond with the above information. Your file will be submitted to the paying bank and bank contact coordinates shall be given to you accordingly.

Regards,

Dr. Richard James

Protocol Officer

This was the first time that a scammer explained why it wasn't a scam. It was good enough for me:

What's up, Doc!

You don't have to worry about me, I'm going to keep my trap shut tight than Dick's hatband. I don't want anybody trying to take the money that is DESERVEDLY MINE!! I don't know what "fiduciary" means, though. It sounds dirty. Is it dirty, like sex dirty? Look, I'm not that kind of guy, but if it means getting that MONEY than I'll talk, but that's it. Nothing dirty.

MY NAME: Chester Rollo Hooten

MY ADDRESS: 93482 Hamfist Way, Fourdeadin, Ohio 88883

MY MOBILE NUMBER: 202-282-8000

IDENTIFICATION OF MYSELF: Yes, I'm me. And you can trust me, I've known me all my life.

MY OCCUPATION: Swill Management

NEXT OF KIN: Aggripa Hooten (Step-great-uncle by third marriage)

Thanks for the dough, Doc! I'll remember you in my will!

Chester

I never got a reply from Dr. James. Perhaps it was because he called the number and spoke to the receptionist at Homeland Security.

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SCAM #33: LUENG WING LOK

 Despite the scammer's concern, I wasn't at all surprised at receiving his email:

Do not be surprised about this mail, because it was personally directed to you. I need you to partner with me to execute a Business that will be of great benefit to both of us. It is about transferring the Sum of $19,500,000.00 USD from my Bank to a private account that I would advise you to open. My name is Mr. Leung Wing Lok. I work with Hang Seng Bank in Hong Kong. I will give you details of the transaction if I receive your response that you are willing and dependable to carry out the transaction with me in absolute confidentiality. I look forward to hearing from you.

Please Email me directly on my private email below:

LWING215@GMAIL.COM     

Sincerely yours.

Mr. Leung Wing Lok.

These guys are always demanding absolute confidentiality, despite emailing a million people a day. But I had no problem with that:

Dear Mr. Lok,

You got in touch with me just in time! Surgeons just removed my hibiscus, and the hospital is charging me an arm and a leg -- as if removing my hibiscus wasn't enough!

Sharing that 19 million buckaroos would be alright by me, yes indeed it would. What do I have to do to get my larger-than-average hands on it? And I promise to keep this whole thing a secret. Unlike you, I'm not going to give a PENNY to my friends. In fact, I'm going out to buy myself a whole new set of people to drink with. You, too, if you'd like! So let me know.

Your new drinking buddy,

Chester Hooten

PS: Lueng Wing Lok, Hang Seng Bank -- it sounds like a Dr. Suess story!

I always hope that when I send a short email, the scammers will reply in kind. I'm always disappointed:

I Need More Information Please.

Good Day.

And thanks for your interest in this Deal; honestly I don’t know you too well. But I am sorry if I am disturbing your privacy, something in my spirit move me to contact you to see if you will be interested I have no option but went online to search for assistance I did find your email on my private search on net where I came across your email address, let me introduce myself with full information about this business deal, My name is Mr. Leung Wing Lok. I work with the Hang Seng Bank. There is a sum of $19,500,000.00 in my Bank Hang Seng Bank, Hong Kong. There were no beneficiaries stated concerning these funds which mean no one would ever come to claim it after all my investigations I find out that the beneficiary of the fund was involve in car accident and there is no next of kin stated to this fund in my Bank, this is a deal which I cannot handle alone at this point of time That is why I ask that we work together as Partner. I do solicit for your assistance in effecting this transaction. I intend to give 30% of the total funds as compensation for your assistance and I shall send you the details and necessary procedures with which to make the transfer effective. once again Like I said due to this issue on my hands now, it became necessary for me to seek your assistance, I don't really know if you can help me execute this project, and I am quite certain about that. You should not have anything to worry about, I will do everything legally required to ensure that the project goes smoothly, it shall pass through all Laws of International Banking, and you have my word. Having resolved to entrust this transaction into your hands, I want to remind you that, it needs your commitment and diligent follow up. If you work seriously, the entire transaction should be over in a couple of days, I don’t really know you but something moved me to contact you by email as I was really looking for assistance not even anybody close to me or anybody located in my country because of the confidentiality

READ THE FOLLOWING AND GET BACK TO ME:

Firstly, I will want to know precisely the type of occupation that you do and how old you are, you should note that this project is highly capital intensive, this is why I have to be very careful, I need your total devotion and trust to see this through. I know we have not meet before, but I am very confident that we will be able to establish the necessary trust that we need to execute this project.

I am now in contact with Santander Bank Plc in Mexico, so I intend that you open an account in your name in this foreign bank in Northern America, Mexico to be precisely. So that the total Fund $ 19,500,000 USD would be transferred to your account which you will open with the Bank in Mexico this is the best way I have found, it will protect us from my Bank. I want us to enjoy this money in peace when we conclude. So you should listen to my instructions and follow them religiously this Bank idea is the best and safe way to carry out this deal because there will be no trace, Just follow my instructions because this is my field of work and I know all Implications ahead it if there is any mistake that’s why I want you to follow my instructions, Also you have to know that I cannot transfer this money in my name as my bank will be aware that it is from me, this is where I need you. As result of this you will have to open an account in the corresponding bank in Mexico. I will obtain a certificate of deposit from my bank here in Hong Kong, it will be issued in your name and this will make you the bonfire owner of the funds. After this the money will be banked online for both of us. You can then transfer the funds to your private/personal bank account before you would have my own share transfer to an account which I would provide for you to transfer my own share of 70% from the total funds.

I will also perfect the documentations with the assistance of my attorney to give the transaction the legal right. Before I commence, I will need you to make me trust you and send me a copy of any form of your identification (Driver's license Work ID or International passport) I want to be sure that I am transacting with the correct person with trust from the heart because due to the way I arrange this deal I don’t Need any Phone conversation from you at this point just to avoid trace and for security reasons. As soon as I get all required details from you, I will commence the paper work. I hope you will understand why I need all these, the money in question is big and I want to ensure that I know you well before I proceed to give you all the details to commence the project. I will send every detail you will need to contact the bank in Mexico so that you can commence communication with them. Ensure that you keep this project confidential; do not discuss it with anybody, because of the confidential nature of this transaction and my work Please this is my chance to make it in life

Please reply soonest.
Regards
Mr.Leung Wing Lok

 My soonest wasn't soon enough, because the following email appeared immediately after the first -- with family photos!

Your Identity is Required

Today at 12:15 AM

As I have said in my previous mail, I want to let you know of myself once again so that you will be rest assured of whom you are transacting with. I am married with two children Liu my daughter and Lee my son; I am sending you my family picture now for you to see. My address is #1, Fortune Garden, 20 Wing Ting Road, Ngan Chi Wan, Kln, and Hong Kong. I have lived here for the last 17 years. It is not a good idea to have your documents send via mailing you can scan and attached or still send via email the way I just sent you mine, Please I also want you to send your picture with your family picture if possible so that we both can be fully trusted in the Blood Just for me to trust you because I don’t want us to talk on phone to avoid trace due to the way I fixed everything that’s will never lead to trace as we are going to enjoy this Money in Good faith. It’s just for you to ask information from me before you do anything about this transaction I have really invested much in this transaction so I will please tell you to accept the 30% of the total funds that I intend to give to you.

Please endeavour to keep this transaction confidential, Please do not discuss it with anybody and do not share your email with anybody, I have a 14 years career with my Bank (Hang Seng) and I don’t Intend to ruin all that. I really can’t wait till the funds leave my Bank because I have not been able to sleep nor eat properly for the past days. Attach to this email is my work ID and my family pictures for your reference.

Well if I may remind you again, you are required to send at least a copy of your Driver's License or International Passport or any valid ID proof of yourself. Also you will send me you full profile of yourself like Your Full Names, Your Occupation, Age, where you work at present your house address and some of your Family picture if possible just for us to trust each other and make me free minded transacting this deal with you

Also note that everything about this Deal would be done online, in other words you do not need to travel to Mexico to open an account with Santander Bank in Mexico, because the account you will need to open is an online offshore account, so everything has to be done Online.

The most important issue is that I want to be sure I am transacting with the correct person, I believe these information would be enough to confirm your interest, I don’t want to miss this chance because if I do the total fund will later be process to the Bank Treasure as Government fund why few part will be given to the Orphanage home, Please try to understand my Point right here

Best Regards,
Mr.Leung Wing Lok

That's one happy family. I wonder if they know that their images are being used to promote an international scam. But that ID, though, is barely better than what I could come up with, so I didn't even try. But a quick Google Image search under "Family" was all I needed to fulfill the other part of his request:

My, you have a handsome family! It must be all that moo shu pork.

Your email arrived just as I was going to get a driver's license, so that will have to wait for a few days. However, here's my personal information as you requested:

NAME: Chester Hooten

ADDRESS: 69 Hungerdunger Road; Sinatra, New Jersey 

OCCUPATION: Scraping pigeon shit off the sidewalk

I've attached a family photo. Our kids are adopted, so don't get any funny ideas about us.

Chester Hooten

Looks like that photo scared him off. He never replied. I can't say that I blame him. (And special thanks to the anonymous family for putting their very special photo online for my use!)


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